Wednesday, June 27, 2012

The Zucchini Blues

Now that one of our groups of friends has gotten into music, there are regular music-themed parties.  This weekend we attended a Blues Party.  Because this was just so clever, you have to see the invitation we received:

Your Part
A few good men/women who can do the blues (your terms, your music!).  Can be vocal, rap, harmonica, guitar, you name it!  (Please respond on this so we know who's sing'in/play'in or speak'in)
Perhaps a bit of grits to share and blues appropriate drink. 
Sing'in the blues
1. Most Blues begin, "Woke up this morning."
2. "I got a good woman" is a bad way to begin the Blues, 'less you stick something nasty in the next line, like "I got a
good woman with the meanest face in town."
3. The Blues is simple. After you get the first line right, repeat it. Then find something that rhymes ... sort of: "Got a
good woman - with the meanest face in town. Got teeth like Margaret Thatcher - and she weigh 500 pound."
4. The Blues are not about choice. You stuck in a ditch: You stuck in a ditch, ain't no way out.

Blues Drinks
If you ask for water and Baby give you gasoline, it's the Blues. Other acceptable Blues beverages are:
· bad wine
· bad whiskey or bad bourbon (would elixir qualify?)
· muddy water
· black coffee

Blues Names (if you don't bring one, we'll give you one!)
Make yer own Blues name (starter kit):
· name of physical infirmity (Blind, Cripple, Lame, etc.)
· first name (see above) plus name of fruit (Lemon, Lime, Kiwi, etc.)
· last name of President (Jefferson, Johnson, Fillmore, etc.)
For example, Blind Lime Jefferson, or Cripple Kiwi Fillmore, etc

Blues attire: Cotton and wool make good blues clothing. Lycra does not.
Shoes with tassels are not blues shoes. Other dress shoes are, as long as they got holes in 'em from walkin' so far to try
to find that no-good, sorry woman what left you. If you own a pair of Air Jordans, you cannot have the blues

Who could possibly not have fun with this?  I thought I made a delightful Lame Lemon Polk, and am thinking about adding it to the blog as my nickname.  And, in order to be worthy of playing with such fun people, I wrote and performed the "Zucchini Blues," with the aid of Mr. W.C. Handy:

The Zucchini Blues
by Toni Sutton & W.C. Handy

I hate to see garden season come 'round
I hate to see garden season come 'round
'cause it's time to get those seeds in the ground

Feelin' tomorrow like I feel today
Feel tomorrow like I feel today
I'll pack my trowel and my seeds away
Garden season, with your bugs and dirt
work that ground, til my my muscles hurt
'Tweren't for food now that ain't food no more
We'd be buying all our food at the store---the store

Got the zucchini blues just as blue as I can be
That squash and it's friends just keep on pickin' on little ol' me
Or else my grow rate wouldn't be just one in three
Zucchini Blues...


RobinH said...

One of the guys in my music club set the whole 'how to sing the blues' schtick to music. Hilarious! (Have you seen the whole list? It's here:

RobinH said...

Alas, but I fear 'white chocolate martini' is not a Blues beverage. Sorry.


You know you've reached a whole new level of gardening when you receive a wholesale catalog.....