Hate It When That Happens

Sometimes if my back/hip are really sore, a night of deep (a.k.a. drug-assisted) sleep really helps.  Of course, that means sometimes it doesn't work at all, and last night was one of those nights.  When I woke up this morning, my hip had turned quite a bit, and now that I have more muscles trying to STOP it from turning, that really, really, REALLY hurts.  I hate mornings like this.  I did the exercises to move it back in place that I could stand, and am now waiting for the pain pills and muscle relaxers to kick in so I can do the rest. 

Interestingly, last year when this all started, the physical therapist's office had me take regular surveys on level of pain and level of depression, which I thought was odd at first but understood later.  I did get very, very depressed at times.  This year they didn't ask at all, and strangely, I've probably handled it better this time around.  Maybe it's because I now am more realistic about how slow progress is really going to be, or maybe--because of my father, several friends, and several relatives--I have a whole new appreciation of what a bad medical problem really is.  I still hate days like today--especially if the 1/4 of a Valium pill doesn't work and I have to take a full half a pill, which makes me dizzy and spacey all day--but they're down to once a week now.  I've learned to take any progress I can get.................